Leadership Vows To Become Effective

Last April 12, 2024, I attended a Christian mentoring session, not knowing what to expect. Little did I realize, the wisdom I would gain that day would forever change my perspective on life and leadership.

Pastor Rudy started with a powerful statement: "Leaders are defined by their commitment."

He followed it up with an even more profound truth, "Anyone can be a leader, but not everyone can be an effective leader."

Through this blog, I want to share my personal experiences and learnings, not just from a ministry perspective but also in families, relationships, school, and organizations.  

Pastor Rudy outlined six vows, each accompanied by a "make every effort" Bible verse. I'll explain these vows based on my own understanding and experiences. Feel free to agree or disagree.

Last 2023, I was appointed as the Mayor of an organization in our college. I was really hesitant to take the position because it would be a big responsibility with high expectations from people. I didn't understand why others wanted me for the role just because no one else wanted it. I felt pressured, as if the organization would crumble if I didn't take the position. Before accepting, I did my best to prepare by seeking guidance from multiple people. I even kept a dedicated journal to write down questions and ideas for improving the organization and society. I watched leadership videos and read books to become a better leader, as I was aware that my leadership style in high school wasn't the best. What I failed to notice was the importance of building relationships with the new people I would be working with. In high school, my classmates understood and trusted me well, but in college, my new team didn't know me very well initially, which was a mistake on my part.

Vow #1: I vow to maintain my integrity.  

Integrity is not about being perfect; it's about transparency. Without transparency, there can be no trust in relationships. I learned this the hard way when I failed to be transparent with my team and loved ones, causing relationships to crumble. The bravest thing we can do is to ask for help and show vulnerability. 

Being honest and open builds trust in all our relationships, whether it's at school, work, or with our families. When I was a leader in college, I didn't always share my struggles with my team. I thought I had to handle everything on my own, but that only made things harder.

I realized that by keeping everything inside, I was hurting my relationships. People need to know we trust them enough to share our challenges. It's not about showing every weakness, but about being real with others.

Pastor Rudy said, "The worst sins are the ones we hide." That hit me hard. I realized hiding my struggles only made things worse. Now, I make an effort to be open with my friends, family, and teammates.

In 2 Peter 3:14, it says, "Try your best to be without sin and at peace with God." That means doing our best to be honest and at peace with ourselves and others.

So, let's remember: keeping our word and being honest helps build trust and makes our relationships stronger.

Vow #2: I vow to forgive those who have hurt me.

We've all experienced heartbreak, betrayal, and misunderstandings. However, holding onto hate only breeds more pain. As Hebrews 12:14-15 reminds us, "Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; without holiness, no one will see the Lord."

I've been rejected by my parents, experienced multiple relationship heartbreaks (being cheated on, replaced by a best friend, left without reason, etc.), betrayed by friends and trusted people, and misunderstood. Despite all those heartbreaks, I always believed I have no right to hate a person. I try to view others' perspectives, even when I can't understand them, because I myself lack in some ways too. Sometimes it leads to self-pity, but I believe I can be better for the future. I have no power over the past but can focus on the present to improve.

"Those who don't forgive have no peace," says Pastor Rudy, and it's true. Seeing people we haven't forgiven shakes us, which I don't want. For months, it wasn't others I couldn't forgive but myself. It was an ongoing battle in my mind because hating someone is as sinful as killing them. Hating myself felt like committing suicide daily. I know I can do better, so I'm bringing my pains to the Lord to trade for joy. There's so much I've struggled to let go of, but as I walk with the Lord daily, chains have slowly fallen off, and the load has lightened, leading to the next vow.

Vow #3: I vow to relax and trust God.

We must learn to relax in God's presence. Don't carry the world's weight because Jesus Christ has already overcome it. As Hebrews 4:10-11 encourages, "Make every effort to enter that rest."

Pastor Rudy wisely said, "Don't be a leader whose disciples won't follow because you always look tired." If we show we're constantly exhausted and drained, our people will hesitate to follow our steps. Look at God's example - He created the world in six days and rested on the seventh, not because He was tired but to remind us it's okay to rest.

Vow #4: I vow to be an encourager.

No one wants to hear discouraging words. As leaders, we should encourage people. Each person is a mix of problems and potential, and it's up to effective, encouraging leaders to bring out their people's potential, as Romans 14:19 instructs: "Make every effort to do what leads to peace and mutual edification (building up)."

My previous partner was an excellent encourager. Everything he said about me, like "You are strong," revealed potential in me and motivated me to encourage others too. Even during our sorrowful goodbye, his simple encouraging phrases stuck with me. I'm so thankful for the valuable lessons and encouragement he left, which I'll never forget. That spark in my heart from him makes me want to burn brightly to help others know Jesus, because despite my amazing ex being an encourager, it would mean nothing without understanding from Jesus. Isn't it beautiful that we can help build others up?

Vow #5: I vow to be a peacemaker.

There's no purpose in fighting the wrong battles. Even when misunderstood by people, I believe I've misunderstood them too, so I want to be a peacemaker despite feeling weird being partnered with someone who misunderstood me for group work. I tried my best to talk to them and smile. By day's end, I realized the hatred was just in my head, and I'm so glad to see them slowly opening up and greeting me in the school hallways too, as Ephesians 4:3 says: "Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace."

Vow #6: I vow to never stop growing.  

When people stop growing, that's when they die, as 2 Peter 1:5-8 states: "Make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge."

"Learning is the lifestyle of leadership," says Pastor Rudy, which I truly agree with. While I always look forward to learning, the best way to grow is to meet new people.

Recently, I met 31-year-old Ate Z. When she asked if I had a boyfriend, I said, "I had a very beautiful partner, but I believe Jesus wants me to build myself and focus on my grandparents first." She smiled and said, "Some people may feel you've passed the right age but why aren't you married yet?" I was shocked since she seemed so kind and beautiful herself, so I asked her reason. She said she's still waiting for God's perfect partner. Despite traveling extensively, meeting many people, and doing well for herself, she mentioned, "Leah ayawg kahadlok na ma biya tas panahon matod pas kalibutanon pa na panan aw pero ikaw bata paman ka I believe daghan kayo kag mabuhat despite being single! The Lord is preparing you and your partner for each other and believe me if you'll be together even the gates of hell will shake sa anointing ni Lord sainyo relationship. So karon I advise you to wait and listen to the Lord's will saimo life and ask for the capacity to receive and accept His will." Hearing her words made me want to cry because having a beautiful, Kingdom-purpose relationship has been my long-time desire. Truly, God's plans are better than my own, even when I can't understand why, but now I'm willing to grow as the Lord molds me into a Proverbs 31 woman worth pursuing.

Dear friends, I encourage you to embrace these leadership vows too. The journey won't be easy, but with God's strength, you can overcome any obstacle. Remember, you are loved, valued, and created for a purpose far greater than you can imagine (Jeremiah 29:11). Trust in the Lord's plan, and He will guide your steps (Proverbs 3:5-6). May His peace and joy overflow in your life as you seek to become an effective leader in every aspect of your world.

If you're interested watching Pastor Rudy's mentoring check this out:
https://fb.watch/rqM8AlKx1y/